Photographic artist Patricia Fortlage brings an ethereal beauty to her new exhibition, Lemonade, My Chronic Illness Story. The exhibition is at Shoebox Projects online gallery through February 25th. Take a long, deep, visual drink.
Fortlage’s inspiration for the series came from shared and nearly identical stories expressed by other women suffering from chronic illnesses and disabilities that were similar to her own. “While I cannot possibly represent an entire population because of the inherent variability in being human, I can definitely share my own experience and hope that people can relate to it. Our culture has very strong ideas on how I should look having a disability, how I should behave, what I should do about my health… if I should exist at all,” she explains.
The exhibition chips away at the stereotypes surrounding disabilities. “There is an overwhelming amount of discrimination, medical gaslighting, misogyny, and dismissal,” she says, along with the assumption that those with disabilities are somehow “faking ill health to gain some sort of perceived systemic benefit.” The reality, she notes, is the complete opposite. “The truth is, I AM faking it. I am faking WELLNESS. To do anything less leaves me vulnerable, dismissed, discarded.”
Her new series is designed to show “there is still beauty here, and power, and fight. That I have much yet to offer. Yes, there are challenges and there are truly gruesome moments… and some of that is shared as well… but I mostly aim to shine a spotlight on the resilience and fighting spirit and beauty that still lives within me.”
Viewers will see images and read writings from Fortlage that are both poignant and genuinely inspiring. There is a stunning image of the artist in a medical gown viewed from the behind, a trail of pearl necklaces running like tears down her exposed back. The image is accompanied by writing about the discovery of Tarlov Cysts that were only addressed by an out-of-town specialist after local doctors and surgeons dismissed her.
In her image “The Breath,” butterflies land on Fortlage’s face, caressing and sustaining her, as she receives oxygen through a nasal cannula.
“On the Menu” is a gorgeous still life reminiscent of 17th century Dutch Golden Age paintings. Along with the flowers and fruit in Fortlage’s image, there are medicines and medical devices. “File 13 or Circular Trashcan” refers to the medical system’s discard of patients whose chronic conditions they fail to understand. Once such trash can is the trivialized Chronic Fatigue System. The image here is a truly haunting one, a black and white photo discarded in a clear plastic cup.
“Manifesting” presents the viewer with a candlelit altar devoted to a variety of medications and treatments, as well as a pretty mask the artist wears figuratively to conceal her condition from those who tire hearing of it. In another image, a levitating double of the artist floats above herself as she lies on the ground, as she questions whether she is still “in there,” despite being unable to pursue her full-time job or athletic activities.
There are images of an overly familiar and thus no-longer frightening MRI tunnel; a piece titled “Weapons of Battle,” in which walking aids are displayed like precious samurai swords; and a lovely image of a perfect floral skirt worn by Fortlage above leg braces. Viewers also see the contents of her purse; the sterile emptiness of a doctor’s waiting room; and in “Elixers,” beautiful but frightening cocktails are presented in voluptuous focus on a silver tray, while medicines are revealed in soft focus behind them.
Also exhibited are a lush noir image of cigarette smoke rising to cause an immune compromised “flare,” while words of fragile independence describe the meaning of another image that reveals a disabled parking sign outside and parking tag inside a vehicle. The exhibition concludes with a somberly lovely and eerie image, “Troubling Thoughts,” which depicts the artist in a bathtub as seen from above, isolated, and alone.
This collection of images is as devastating as it is beautiful, and one that the artist describes as an outgrowth of prior work and who she is as an artist. “I am a documentary and fine art photographer by trade, but I would also describe myself as a subtle activist. I am consistently creating work in hopes to educate and/or inspire positive change… especially for women and girls. This work certainly builds upon that foundation.”
As should be obvious from viewing the exhibition, Fortlage is creating truly lovely and lovingly revealed images that also expose the need to understand “the discrimination, medical gaslighting, misogyny, and dismissal that those of us with chronic illness and disabilities face.” She calls the show a small step toward “exposing that behavior, in lifting the veil, and calling it out.” She hopes that viewers will join in her effort to do just that and lead the way forward with “love and compassion.”
Certainly this fine visual exhibition and its accompanying, poetic, deeply felt prose will encourage just that. Enter the exhibition online and prepare to be moved; and do tune in to the artist talk, Wednesday the 17th at 6 p.m. The link for the Zoom talk is posted here.
- Genie Davis; images provided by the artist